Cleaning Out The Mental Dustbin

by

**This story makes me tear up just a little. Thanks, Bob.

**Montel Williams going off the air. You would have thought Sylvia Browne might have included this in one of her predictions.

**Do you suppose there are blind people who are interested in going to nudist camps? For fun, you could take him to a church camp and tell him it’s a swinger’s weekend. That would be a pretty good prank to pull on a blind nudist.

**I wonder if Dale Earnhardt’s family have thought about putting a roadside memorial right where he died at Talladega Daytona? Maybe in the infield so the drivers don’t hit it. A cross made of plastic flowers seems to be the standard amongst the white trash around these parts.

**Speaking of tacky hillbilly memorials, when you go out and buy a decal commemorating the tragic death of a family member and place it in the rear window of your Tahoe, are you dedicating your entire car to your dead relative or is just the rear windshield, “in memory of Peepaw”? Are the remaining areas of the car body reserved other family members? Can you get one of those fake Calvin stickers of him pissing on the grave of someone you didn’t care for?

**I’ve seen Cloverfield, I Am Legend, and The Descent this winter. Guess which one is the superior movie? If Big Willie had the creatures from The Descent after him instead of lame-ass CGI, Legend might have been a GREAT film, instead of a “that didn’t suck nearly as much as it could have” film. Cloverfield just made me feel car sick for the rest of the day.

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6 Responses to “Cleaning Out The Mental Dustbin”

  1. Ginger Says:

    Sar, Earnhardt died at Daytona, not Talledega.

    Also, I think it would be most appropriate to put a wooden cross in Turn 3 with a Calvin sticker of him pissing on a #24.

    Oh my god…I’m a total redneck!

    /runs and looks up therapist’s phone number

  2. Sarcastro Says:

    Shit! I knew that!

  3. Ginger Says:

    whew…actually the cross would need to be in Turn 4…

    /relieved that I had to deduct points off of my red nekkidness scale for getting the wrong turn number in the first comment…

  4. Exador Says:

    How about going to a nudist camp and pretending you’re blind?

    Think of all the feels you could cop.

  5. Frank Says:

    Or…how about showing up nude and blindfolded in Daytona to piss on Earnhardt’s crash site?

  6. jagosaurus Says:

    That Bob Newhart thing is magnificent.

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