An Old Jew, a Cuban and a Redneck Walk Into A Bar with an alligator on a leash…

by

The bartender says, “Where did you get that?”

The alligator looks up and says, “Florida. They got millions of them.”

With the Dems staying out of it again for the lamest of reasons, the real horse race will be among the Republicans.

GOP

Win: McCain–Back among your people. Elderly military retirees.

Place: Romney— The best thing about Romney getting the eventual runner-up prize VP nod (now taking proposition wagers!), is that if elected, Bruce Campbell will have four years of steady work.

Show: Giuliani–Quien es muy macho? Bienvenidos ala fiesta, culo.

Again, the Democrats have decided to penalize a state for moving up the primary in order to stupidly compete with Iowa and New Hampshire. No delegates for you!

Side bet: This comes back to bite them in the ass in November. All Mee-Maw, and her new husband Sol, will remember is that you didn’t speak at their condo association meeting back in January like that nice Mike Huckabee did. They will remember that very well when they go into the polling place and accidentally vote for Pat Buchanan again.

Dems

Win: Clinton–Would nude wrestle an alligator at half-time at the Orange Bowl to become president.

Place: Obama–Would nude wrestle Hillary at half-time at the Orange Bowl to become president.

Show: Edwards–Would nude wrestle himself, anytime. Outcall appointments available.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: