This Is What Happens When You Find A Stranger In The Alps*

by

There was a time in my life when gambling on football was the only reason to watch the games. I don’t generally bet any more. I hate losing money more than I like winning it. Now, with mouths to feed, I can’t really afford to lose what little money I have after buying baby formula, Xbox games and what have you.

So when little children decide they are going to bet on the Titans against a superior team, and that bet is based on nothing but unrepentant homerism, I can’t pass up that kind of action. It sweetens the pot when the child’s mother decides she wants in as well.

Parenting is all about teaching your children the difference between right and wrong. In this case, betting based on blind allegiance to the local sports franchise is just wrong. Never bet your heart, son. Always bet the spread. You might just wind up eating chocolate pudding out of a diaper.

Mrs. Sarcastro was the first to suffer the indignity.

I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.

Mr. Football Expert got his next.

You’re killing your father, Larry!

He won’t even wear his Vince Young jersey anymore.

*If you have ever sat through The Big Lebowski on Comedy Central, you know what I’m talking about.

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6 Responses to “This Is What Happens When You Find A Stranger In The Alps*”

  1. Ginger Says:

    You are a sick, sick father/husband…(‘scuse me while I make a note of this idea the next time I have to bet somebody on…something.)

  2. Nashville is Talking » Always bet the spread Says:

    […] son. Always bet the spread. You might just wind up eating chocolate pudding out of a diaper. [This Is What Happens When You Find A Stranger In The Alps* – Sarcastro – 12-30-07] Spread It Around: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and […]

  3. Mrs. Sarcastro Says:

    Must we share all of our dirty secrets, dear? Next time please choose a more flattering picture.

  4. Sarcastro Says:

    Not all the dirty secrets honey, just the hilarious ones.

    You think there is such a thing as a flattering picture of you eating out of a diaper?

  5. Exador Says:

    Mrs S,

    You’re definitely the hottest woman I’ve seen eating out of a diaper, and I surf the net a lot.

  6. name is required Says:

    this is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass

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